Time to ponder

Yesterday was a doctor visit day. That means that I am eternally grateful for a sitter to watch my boys for half a day while I have some nice alone time in the waiting room. I have a great doctor, but an unholy waiting time. Regular wait time is 2-2 1/2 hours, and it’s been like that every time. Me thinks next time I ‘m pregnant I’ll change doctors. Nevertheless, she’s great. I bring the laptop to work on pictures, blog, etc, and plenty of snacks and drinks.

I listened to some wonderful podcasts on the way down, a recent CES fireside by Rosemary M. Wixon. No kids in the car and a spiritual talk is a great way to fill the bucket that doesn’t quite get filled at church with antsy kids. She said some great stuff about recognizing the Savior’s presence in our lives:

“When you see His hand in your life, it’s a confirmation of His love. The more you recognize His hand, the more involved He will be in your life, and that’s how you come to know the Savior you once knew'"

I loved this. I don’t think I’ve done very good lately recognizing His hand in my life. Things can get rushed and hectic so quickly, and it takes effort to slow down and to be holy. I love coming to ‘know the Savior you once knew.’ Because we did know him completely before we were born. We are living with amnesia of our pre-earth life, in order for the this mortal testing to be fair. It’s so awesome to know this. It makes everything so, clear. Yet, we need reminders like good talks, scriptures and more to keep the perspective.

I finally made it back to my little room, where I had another 20 minutes of waiting. This time, I sat in the chair, rested my head against the wall, and thought about my mom. I tried hard to remember the sound of her voice and laughter, her love of movies, our little gallivants down to State street in Santa Barbara, eating great chicken burgers at Stackys in Summerland, her sweet letters, and more. It was so nice to have a quiet moment to go back in my mind and think of the wonderful memories I have with her, and the sweet lessons she left with me.

I thought about my state now, how I’m a mother, and how I want to be a loving and kind mom to my sweet, little men. Some days are challenging, and I don’t feel very holy when my kids are being stinkers, but I’m sure glad they are quick to forgive.

Then, it was time to go home. Baby girl is doing well. It was nice to have quiet time to think, ponder, and reflect. I think we all need more of that, as it can be so rejuvenating. It’s a nice way to make a yucky, long doctor waiting time better.